The “My autistic self” campaign being run by Autism Unlimited features real-life examples of some autistic traits and behaviours and the impact that these can have on an individual’s life.
Autistic people may use different ways of communicating and behaving just to be understood and reduce their anxiety. These differences can make them stand out. One of the key traits is masking, when individuals may knowingly or unknowingly suppress parts of their identity just to be accepted.
Here’s Ellie’s story:
Ellie is always masking, which has left her feeling drained and exhausted. It requires a substantial amount of her time and energy to observe others’ behaviours and then replicate the same actions, just to fit in.
She said: “I found it’s harder to unmask around people who have already known you with a mask. If you’re meeting someone new, it’s much easier. After spending so much of my life masking, the idea of opening up and showing my real self can be daunting – especially to those who have known me for so long under a different guise.”
She continued: “They almost have this expectation: they think, oh why are you now acting differently? And then they feel like maybe you’re just putting on an act, maybe you’re just pretending…It’s not true. I’ve just never been myself, truly.”
Fear of social exclusion
The fear of social exclusion can drive the act of masking, and, in Ellie’s case, this is more prominent among people her own age.
She added: “When I am with people my own age, even before I tell them I’m autistic, I always have this feeling, when they meet me, that I’m automatically excluded from things.
“I feel like they have this sensation when they meet you that something’s not quite right, possibly because I’m masking. They feel I’m not being myself, that the way I’m communicating isn’t quite like them and I feel like that automatically excludes me from things.”
There is the underlying fear of being exposed as different, and this only adds to the existing pressure that comes with conforming to neurotypical norms.
Mission to create an inclusive environment
The campaign is part of Autism Unlimited’s mission to create a truly inclusive environment, reduce the stigma around differences and empower autistic people to freely express themselves while knowing that they are understood and accepted.
If you, or somebody you know, has a story that you think could contribute to this campaign or would like to get involved in raising awareness of autism, please email emily.griffiths@autism-unlimited.org.
